Blah at 11dpiui

So today, I feel like poo. My stomach's in a jumble, I'm starving by my 4th class (11ish), and I keep having very sharp pains on my right side that shoot down the crease between my leg and right ovary. UGH! I've been out like a light each night and I'm not known to be a deep sleeper. Then I wake up at 5 (when the first alarm of many--thanks you-know-who) and can't go back to sleep. I want to think that it's implantation, but who knows at this point. I also thought that the wicked witch (AF) was going to visit this morning, I had some really bad cramps when I woke up. I bet if I wasn't going through IF, I wouldn't notice all this junk :)

The big day's is steadily approaching, and I'm praying that we get our BFP this time.

(Just added now at 2:10)--so lunch was at 1:15 or so and I was starving. I could only eat my oatmeal and half my veggie chips. Couldn't eat my grapes or pudding because I wasn't really even hungry for them. I want to know what is going on so badly, is this a sign or am I being a whack job? I really don't want this to be all in my head. . . or because of progesterone. . .

Kids having kids

No, 17 year old, I don't want to see pictures of your baby. Why, you're 17, I don't care about the whole unmarried thing, unlike one of my older (she's 70) colleagues. I just want you to take care of the kid. And for some of these kids, I know that isn't happening. Some of these kids are NOT smart enough to take care of a kid, I know, I have them in class. I feel like such an awful person for saying all of this, but why did God bless them with a child, while he's making me and DH jump through hoops? We did the right thing--married, check; real job, check; house, check. . . . ahhhhhh. And then I found out today that these girls PLANNED their pregnancy, what?????!!!!

Sorry for the rant, I just had to get it off my chest. I am not a horrible person, just trying to learn why things happen. I know the saying "God will never give you more than you can handle," but why make nice, good, decent people jump through all the hoops. Am I proving myself?

All done, back to being hopeful and chipper. Just had to vent for a second. Cramping and lower back pain pretty much all day, and I'm hungry again, I'm always freaking hungry. I don't know what it is, but I am, and I ate lunch an hour and a half ago. Thing is my stomach's all blah right now, but I'm still hungry, what gives?

Ok, enough from me for the day. Time to go put on the 7 layers of clothes and go to practice. BFP here I come!

Double Digits--YAY!

Today marks the double digit past IUI--10! Getting soooo close to testing and I'm getting so nervous. I am still very confident this is our time to be parents. Yesterday the clumsiness continued with me tripping INTO the shower, and dropping my keys about 15 times. I also went to bed at 9 last night, woke up at 5:45 this morning and probably could've slept for a few more hours if I had the opportunity. Also having some boob pain like last month (which I'm attributing to the progesterone) but also some pains on the side that come and go. I want to think they're real, but I'm also a mental case right now, so everything's up in the air.

Last night I had a dream, though. It was the first baby dream I've ever had. I found out that we were having a boy. But the dream was so strange, they pulled the baby out of me, checked the gender, then put it back in. I'm hoping it's my body telling me something :) I had a dream last time that I got a BFP, and we all know how that worked out for us. . .

Any thoughts?????

What in the world is going on. . . .

So today is 9dpiui. . . still not really feeling anything! What is going on here?!?!? I was certain that everything was great, but I feel nothing. Reading message boards doesn't help because women will say that they had symptoms, then spotting (implantation), then more symptoms--I want to write on the board and say "helllloooo, you can't have pregnancy symptoms BEFORE you're pregnant!" I am also on progesterone which mimics any kind of pregnancy symptoms you may think you have, it's actually probably the meanest drug out there. It makes your boobs sore and you feel all bloated ALL the time. The only thing I've had this month is lower back pain (almost kidney-type pain) and some ovarian pain, mostly cramping.

This weekend something else struck me as strange--I was VERY clumsy! Now those of you that know me know that this is not unusual, but the extreme clumsiness that occurred was crazy! Saturday, I was making chicken salad and dropped the mayo on the floor (thank goodness for plastic containers). My DH thought it was the funniest thing in the world, and kept asking what happened and I had no idea. Then last night we were making chicken tacos for dinner and I dropped the lid for the chipotle spice, knocked the vegetable oil over, spilled veggies everywhere. . . . It's like a three-ring circus at our house right now.

I hope that being clumsy is a good sign, I'll take 9 months of clumsiness!!!! I've also had a bad taste in my mouth for a couple days now, I'm hoping and praying for some good news this weekend!

Day 8

It feels like it should be so much later today, I guess that's what happens when you get up early and go to church and actually get things done! We are finishing watching Julie and Julia and it's all that I can do to not think about the fact that I will be testing very soon (1 week from now). I still have zero symptoms, which is very different from last time--I had all these twinges and feelings in my abdomen, it was probably just gas :)

I've been saying lots of prayers for DH and I to be blessed with our first child, I feel selfish asking for something for ourselves, but it's all I can do to stay sane. I have to believe that this will work and all the heartache I felt last month after getting the dreaded BFN will be wiped away this month with a BFP. I'm still trying to stay very positive but I'm getting nervous as "test" day nears. I hope that everyone will keep us in their thoughts and prayers, we really appreciate them all!

Half Way, woo-hoo!

Today is the 7 day mark, half way through the dreaded 2ww. It has felt like forever but it went fast, and that probably doesn't make any sense but oh well. I woke up this morning feeling nothing. Yesterday sick, today nothing. Hmmmmm, weird. I'm chalking it up to the progesterone, but still feel positive about this IUI.

It's Saturday night and I'm doing laundry and DH is at the gym. I'm just so stinking tired all the time, soccer is wearing me out! All that fresh air, crisp, freezing, cold air.

Only different thing that I've noticed this cycle is back pain, but I think that's from standing for hours at school and practice. Please pray that this works, that's all I've been doing :)

Great Distraction!

So last night we went and saw John Mayer and he was AMAZING! It was such a great distraction from what I've been going through and thinking about. I just got to sit back and enjoy a show with a wonderful hubbie and some good friends. I didn't have anything to drink either (despite the goofy picture DH took of us and posted on fb).

I'm 6dpiui and yesterday my back started to hurt over my right side. It felt like when I had a kidney infection when I was younger (didn't drink enough water), but it was just on the one side (which is also the side I had 2 follies). I'm hoping it's a good sign. I also woke up this morning with a nice case of nausea. I thought I was going to hurl everywhere, I ate a piece of toast, no help. I came to work, no help. Finally 5 hours later, I am feeling a little better but have a nasty taste in my mouth. Who knows, maybe I'm just being a head case? It could also be the fact that 7 hours of teaching + 2 hours of soccer= a whole lotta tired, and that could've cause the nausea. Only time will tell, 9 days until testing, might as well be a million. Here's hoping and praying this is it! Baby thoughts :)

5dpiui, the journey continues

It's 5 dpiui and still nothing, no twinges, cramping, nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach. . . . I think that the women that claim to have these symptoms at 3dpiui are crazy (sorry if you're one of them, I was one last month). It is WAY TOO EARLY for any of that, implantation hasn't even happened yet! I'm taking it easy and enjoying the ride, well impatiently enjoying the ride.


Soccer season starting has been awesome and exhausting all at the same time. DH and I went to bed at 9:30 last night, and I've been waking up at 4 am the past few mornings for no real good reason. It's like my body thinks it's time to get up, when all I want is a few more hours of sleep!

Is it March 14th yet? It'd be awesome to have a "St. Patrick's Baby," hubby would love that! John Mayer concert is tonight, should be a good distraction. . .

4 dpiui. . . still waiting

So today marks the 1/4 of the wait done. I had some really weird pains on my left side in the groin area. It was a shooting pain and it happened about 3 times this morning. Not reading much into it, but it was very strange.

Soccer season's in full swing, and it's helped to keep my mind off the wait. I really want to play, but I'm thinking big picture, especially since I'm PUPO (pregnant until proven otherwise). It's nice to think that right now I have a life beginning inside me, even though at this point it would just be cells dividing, I'll take it! All the obsessive research I've done says that implantation happens anywhere from day 6 to day 12 after IUI/ovulation. . . so there isn't really even anything to test at this point. The boobs are still tender from the hcg shot, but it's manageable.

Well, it's off to lunch and then 2 classes before practice. This getting home at 6:30 really stinks!! I'm exhausted!

What Not to Say to a Woman Going Through IF

Are you pregnant?
Are you pregnant yet?
So when are you going to get pregnant?
I had no problem getting pregnant. . .
It's all in God's plan (so does HE not want me to be a mom?)
It'll happen when it happens. . .
Enjoy being married . . .
You're young. . .
It's not all it's cracked up to be. . .
Stop stressing about it. . .
Why are you so worried?

This is a few samplings of things you should keep in your head and NEVER say to a woman who is trying to get pregnant (and I've heard them all :( )